When I asked Mary what she learned in her class on Sunday she responded, "The mommy showed a picture but I didn't know that guy's name."
Take Two
Later, when David was telling us about how Joseph Smith read the Bible and decided to pray, Mary interrupted him, "In my story the guy said no prayer!"
Huh?
Take Three
David then whispered to us the story of how the boy Joseph was brave when a piece of infection in his bone was cut out. (Apparently this story is so terrible that it must be spoken of only in whispers.) Mary, her voice well above a whisper, began talking about Joseph Smith and the lions.
Joseph Smith and the lions?
"Wait! Mary," I interrupted, "Did you learn about Daniel and the lions den? Is that the picture your teacher showed you?"
"Yeah! Daniel! That's that guy's name!"
Take Four
"Let me try again. The guy his name was Daniel and Jesus said NO PRAYERS and Daniel went in his room--"
"Mary, I don't think it was Jesus who said not to say prayers. I think it was the king."
Take Five
"Okay, let me try again. The guy his name was Daniel and the guy his name was King said NO PRAYERS and Daniel went in his room and said a prayer so he got thrown into the lions but he said a prayer and the lion didn't hurt him."
Looks of astonishment.
"WOW!! Mary! We LOVE what you learned in Sunbeams! Thank you so much for telling us the story!"
She looked at us very seriously, her head barely reaching over the top of the dinner table.
Take Six
"I want to tell it again."
David is playing air guitar beside her with the accompanying kindergarten rock-n-roll noises and spittle.
"The guy his name was Daniel and the guy his name was King said NO PRAYERS and Daniel went in his room and said a prayer so he got thrown into the lions but he said a prayer and the lion didn't hurt him."
"Wow, Mary! Thank you! We are so happy you shared that story with us. You know it very well."
Take Seven
Exactly the same as Take Six.
Take Eight
No more air guitar.
"The guy his name was Daniel and the guy his name was"--
David interrupts, "Oh, no! Not again!"
Mom and Dad, "Hush! Stop complaining and listen to your sister!"
Meanwhile, Mary continued, "King said NO PRAYERS and Daniel went in his room and said a prayer so he got thrown into the lions but he said a prayer and the lion didn't hurt him."
"Okay, Mary. Thanks."
Take Nine
"The guy his name was--"
David moans and covers his ears, "AAAHHH! Not again!"
"Um, Mary, maybe you can wait--"
"--Daniel and the guy his name was King said NO PRAYERS and Daniel went in his room and said a prayer so he got thrown into the lions but he said a prayer and the lion didn't hurt him."
Takes Ten through Fourteen
The same as Take Nine, except that by this point David was rolling around on the floor, holding his head in his hands, writhing in pain, screaming, "I can't take it anymore! Make it stop!! I can't hear this story again! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"
(Greg and I felt much the same way.)
Mary looked very cute and serious.
Take Fifteen
"The guy--"
"Mary, this is the last time, honey."
"Why?"
"Um...because we'd like to talk about something else. But we're very happy that you learned that story."
"Okay. The guy his name was Daniel and the guy his name was King said NO PRAYERS and Daniel went in his room and said a prayer so he got thrown into the lions but he said a prayer and the lion didn't hurt him."
"Thank you, Mary."
"You're welcome."
